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Building Confidence for the First Date

Not all of us are blessed with the self-confidence and poise that is so attractive on the first date. In fact, it is totally normal to feel nervous and shy on a first date, especially when it is the first time meeting each other. However, self-confidence is key to striking up a good first impression. Presenting yourself in a good light sets the precedence for the rest of the date. How you present and portray yourself affects how your date will see you and treat you as well! Through our years of experience aiding singles in regaining their confidence, we have some tips to share in this area! That being said, self-confidence is not something that can be taught or passed on; the end result is dependent on your willingness to change. Let's jump right into it!

Power Posing

It's normal to feel nervous before a first date. But don't dwell on it and let it get the better of you! Here is an easy tip that can help adjust your mentality and bring out the alpha in you. Take a few minutes to do some power poses at home before you head out for your date. The point of power posing is to make yourself big. Stretch yourself out and occupy a big space. Some examples are to sit with your legs wide open, or to stand up straight and stretch your arms out. The idea is to mimic the actions of someone in a position of high power. So just imagine if you were a boss, instructing your subordinate to complete an assignment. That would put you in the mental framework that you are the one in power. Simple actions and mindset finetuning such as these can help to put you in the confident headspace to combat shyness and insecurity, at least in the short-term.

Prepare conversation topics

If you are afraid of awkward silences and are worried about the conversation aspect of the date, the good news is that this is something that you can prepare for! Prepare some conversational topics before meeting your date. Think about the topics that you are familiar with or enjoy talking about. It can be your hobbies, what you are good at, childhood memories or food, just remember to keep it neutral and light-hearted. This way, you will feel more assured having some starters up your sleeve in case the conversation runs into a dead end, which can help to ease some nerves. Generally, the more prepared you are, the more confident you will come across. Since you have the luxury of time to plan it out as well, try to choose topics that will frame you in a flattering or positive light. Speaking about a positive trait that you are proud of can boost your confidence levels when conversing. But be careful not to come across as boastful or flashy.

Rejection therapy

The fear of rejection prevents many of us from performing to our full potential. Many times, we might have our sights set on achieving a certain goal or doing certain things in life. But because we get afraid of what people might say or think about us and reject and put us down, many of us stop short in our tracks and give up on whatever hope that we had to accomplish our goal. As human beings, it is natural that we are afraid of rejection to a certain extent. Rejection Therapy is a game cum social experiment where we put ourselves through various tasks that will lead to rejection. As painful as that sounds, there is a method to this madness. The idea is to get rejected enough so much so that you adapt to the physical stress and fear of rejection, coming out of this experience more confident. We might get nervous on a first date because we are afraid that the other person might not like what they see. If you fall into this category, try out the Rejection Therapy experiment! Not only can it help to boost confidence in your dating life, it is sure to help you feel more confident facing life in general. There are many tips and details out on the internet about this, and many people who have done it have come out alive and more confident than ever. When you are no longer afraid of rejection, you become more daring to take chances without the fear of falling straight on your face. This will definitely open up more opportunities for you in life. Remember, the first step is always the hardest. It can only get easier.


Last but not least, smile! It is such a simple action, yet incredibly effective. Smiling during the date not only leaves a positive impression on your date but can also help you feel more relaxed as well. It is human nature to mirror a smile. So, when you start smiling, your date will instantly smile back at you, which leaves a pleasant feeling in both you and your date. There are also many chemical reactions that happen in your brain when you smile that helps to relieve stress and boost your mood. So, do both yourself and your date a favour by smiling, it truly goes a long way. These are just some tips to boost your confidence when on a first date, and even life in general. Confidence is absolutely an important aspect of our lives and truly shapes the way that we view life itself, and how others view us as well. It is not something easily gained, but once attained, goes a long way.

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